5-18-11 - Cheating, Congo and An Interview with Nathan Winograd

In case you missed it...

JANETTE'S CATS, CHEATING SPOUSES AND CALLERS WEIGH IN

Today was the second day when Janette and the ensemble filled in for Rosie while she was away for a few days.  Janette said they would be speaking to Nathan Winograd, the Executive Director of No Kill Advocacy Center for animals.  On that note, Janette said her cat Whitey Brown peed on her coat this morning right in front of her!  She said they had almost got him to the point where he stopped the peeing, but now he's doing it again.  Deirdre suggested she take him to the vet to make sure there's nothing wrong with him and Pete said he read an article that said you should play with your cat to to encourage prey activity.  But Janette said that's the reason she doesn't have a dog!  She said she loves and kisses her cats when she comes home but she's admittedly a workaholic.  Janette has three cats. There's Bismarck, the hairless that leaves a mark from the oils and dander in his skin wherever he lays. Beastly the "biter" and Whitey Brown the "pee'er." Pete said his cat started peeing when they had two kids and when they had the third baby it went crazy.  He said the cat obviously wasn't happy in a household with kids so he gave the  cat  away to a couple who didn't have any.  They gave him away for a trial period at first and it was so successful the other couple kept him!  Janette's said she's afraid if she gives her cat away for peeing they'd have him put down.

The staff then discussed the latest news about Arnold Schwarzenegger's affair and child he had with his mistress.  The story really bothered Deirdre.  She couldn't imagine the betrayal Maria must now feel knowing this person was pregnant and living in the house with her own family!  Janette feels horrible for Maria too.

Janette took several callers on the topic.  One caller felt badly for the kids and commented on how hard this must be for Maria after 25 years of marriage. One caller heard the news came out because Arnold wasn't paying to support his child who he fathered with his mistress.  And one caller (PETRA!) said there's no way Maria Shriver didn't know about the affair that was happening under her own roof. Janette said some people can refuse to see the nose on their own face!  Janette wasn't sure if Maria knew because she said Maria left as soon as she found out.  Petra then mentioned the Facebook group she started entitled Keep Janette Barber on Sirius!  Janette was delighted when she found out about the group and delighted that Petra called in!  Janette then introduced Petra to the staff and the listeners at home.  Janette said Petra was just a Facebook friend at first, who then took it upon herself to throw an auction for Janette's charity MMFC in an attempt to help Janette raise money!  First she set up a page to auction off the Christmas crafts the Rosie Radio staff created and then she threw another auction more recently with donated and autographed Rosie memorabilia!  Petra said it all happened very organically but now she has a whole community working together to help raise money for a great cause!  Janette thanked Petra for calling in and for all she's done for MMFC.

Janette took a call from a listener who forgave a boyfriend for cheating.  She said she grew suspicious because her boyfriend was always hiding his cell phone.  Then she noticed an unrecognized number on his phone and she called it several times.  A girl answered most of the time but one time her boyfriend answered!  After the anger went away she looked inside and realized that his cheating wasn't about her, that it was about him not being able to love himself enough.  Janette gave the caller credit for being so evolved with her emotions.  Janette said she dated someone who admitted to cheating after the woman he cheated with scratched his face.  They stayed together for a while after the indiscretion but eventually they went separate ways.

Janette took a call from a listener whose husband cheated on her and she eventually forgave him and they're still together.  She said when cheating happens in marriage you always struggle with it and you never really forget.  Her son was involved in discovering the betrayal and she made her husband apologize to their son and tell him what he did was very wrong.

Janette took a call from a listener whose boyfriend cheated on her and she ended up marrying him. She said she didn't forgive him but he was very young at the time he cheated.  She said if it happened now she would kick him out but today they have a fantastic marriage.  Janette said there are so few things that are unforgivable in her mind.  She said most things could be forgiven if you choose to make the choice to forgive.

Deirdre was in a relationship once and was cheated on.  She said it wasn't the act of the man cheating that really affected her but the person she became afterward.  She said she started being suspicious and wondering who was calling him.  She said she became a person she didn't want to be.  Deirdre thought it was interesting to hear the caller say they'd make their husband apologize to their son.  She wasn't sure children should get that involved when parents make mistakes.  And a few years ago Janette was convinced that her boyfriend Barry was having an affair.  Though she had no proof or reason to suspect him she decided it was true and she even thought she knew who it was with!  Turns out it never happened and she had made the entire thing up in her head!

OUR CULPABILITY IN WHAT'S HAPPENING IN CONGO
Janette mentioned an amazing article Eve Ensler wrote about Congo.  The article came from the recent statistics coming out of Congo that say that 48 women are raped every hour in Congo and 1 in 3 women in Congo have been raped.  Janette said Congo is the most dangerous place in the world to be a woman.  Janette was in Congo in the year 2000 and she said it truly is one of the most dangerous places on Earth.  The 10 years of war in Congo has taken the lives of more than 5.5 million people.

Janette said she is very passionate about International relief and she believes it is everyones' responsibility to help.  She said we're culpable in the atrocities because of blood minerals.  The money from the minerals we purchase for our cell phones and computers goes to pay for the wars!  We're spending 180 million dollars a year to get minerals from Congo and we purchase them there because they're cheap!  We can get the minerals much cheaper if we get them from Congo as opposed to getting them from Australia and Brazil, where there's no conflict.  Janette said this is a true example of how everything we do affects everything else in the world.  Janette said we got the great deal on our cell phone or computer because the person in the mine only got $1 a day to mine that mineral.  And Janette said, if we're part of the problem, we need to be as conscious as we can.  She said perhaps we don't need as many computers or we don't need to constantly upgrade our cell phones.  She said we can start demanding the companies we purchase our products from get their minerals from somewhere else! She said we can use the power of knowledge to make a difference in the world.  Janette said RIGHT NOW a woman is being raped in Congo.  Right now.  And the money to fund that conflict came from us.

Pete recommended some sites listeners can visit to learn more about the conflict and to help raise funds and awareness.  One site was RunforCongoWomen.org and the other site he mentioned was AThousandSisters.org where they are doing a virtual march to pressure the government to appoint a special envoy to Congo because the U.S. government doesn't have a policy in place to properly handle this situation.  Shoshana wondered how much the cost of our computers would actually rise if we got the minerals from Brazil or Australia.  And she wondered if consumers were willing to pay to be socially conscious.  Janette said none of us can think our actions don't affect the world we live in. She said we all can make change even if you can only do something very small.  Janette and the staff encouraged listeners to take action!

REGISTRY WOES AND TEFLON VS. CAST IRON
On a much lighter note, Shoshana said she has a terrible quandary about her wedding registry.  She originally registered for Calphalon non-stick cookware but she was told not to get those because the Teflon causes cancer.  So she also registered for a much more expensive cast iron cookware but she's still undecided.  Shoshana said it's a tough call and she feels conflicted about it.  Shoshana did some research on the different types of cookware and said cast iron says it may improve health but ceramic might be just as good without the bother of the heavy pans.  And she read that Teflon cookware is safe. Deirdre didn't believe it for a second that Teflon is safe.  Janette said Teflon will kill birds when heated to a certain degree and Shoshana said that's because birds have a completely different respiratory system than humans.  Shoshana pointed out that she's not a bird!  Janette recalled pretty much every government study that ever told us the government was once wrong in saying a product was safe before finding out it wasn't.  Shoshana said she needs to decide how to live her best life based on all the news stories coming at her.  And Janette said we're living in a world that's becoming more toxic everyday and any change we can make in our daily routines will help.  She said we cannot get rid of all toxins but we can make an effort to minimize them.

Janette and Shoshana took a few callers on the topic.  One caller said cast iron will last Shoshana forever and she'll never have to replace them while the Teflon and stainless steel pans are not as sturdy. Then they took a call from a listener who really likes her Teflon pans!  She said when her pans get scratched or start to peel she simply replaces the pan.  Janette recommended the caller google the dangers of Teflon and how the chemicals get into our food and released into the air.  

NATHAN WINOGRAD AND NO KILL SHELTERS
Janette then introduced Nathan Winograd, the Executive Director of No Kill Advocacy Center, who was on the telephone for the interview.  Janette thanked him for coming on the program and said how you treat  animals says everything in the world about what kind of person you are.  Nathan is a former criminal prosecutor who has written two books on the subject - Redemption: The Myth of Pet Overpopulation and the No Kill Revolution in America and Irreconcilable Differences: The Battle for the Heart & Soul of America's Animal Shelters.  He is the voice of America's displaced pets and the conscious of industry. Nathan said the  majority of animals killed in shelters are killed because the shelter has turned away rescue groups offering to save the animals.  He said it's tragic and sad and for some this is the first time these animals are neglected and abused  - at the shelters that are supposed to protect them from it!

Nathan said oftentimes it all comes down to the person running the shelter.  He said a shelter is a refuge or haven for abused, homeless or displaced animals that are supposed to be recuperating. Unfortunately, their fate often lies with the person operating the facility.  But communities are coming together now and ending the killing of these animals.  He said the transformation sometimes takes years to occur but it can happen when the directors who have become complacent with the killing are replaced by true animal lovers.  He said you expect the people who work at the shelters to be animal lovers but that's not always the case.  

Nathan encouraged listeners to on Google and type in "animal shelter and abuse and neglect" and what you will see and read will be jaw-dropping.  He said the good news is they're now having the conversation about it and he's seen a dramatic transformation in some areas.  He said people from all walks of life are coming together to save the lives of these shelter animals.  

Janette asked for the reasons a shelter would rather kill an animal rather than adopt it out.  Nathan said the real reason is inertia and uncaring.  He said several shelters have been given a free ride and have operated under the "do what we've always done" mentality despite reasonable alternatives.  Nathan said we are a nation of animals lovers and we should expect that animal shelters respect our same values.  Janette said she often turns away from animal abuse because it's too hard for her to face but when she realizes that it's her tax dollars at work and these institutions aren't respecting her values, it really hits a chord with her.

Janette asked if putting animals down really saves money.  Nathan said it's actually more cost effective to save the lives of the animals then warehouse and kill them.  He said we don't have to take funding from other programs in order to do it either!  He said when shelters have someone adopt an animal it actually brings in revenue and when they kill them they forgo the revenue.  Then they also have to spend money to kill the animals and to dispose of them.  Nathan said many people have the misconception that places like the ASPCA are no kill shelters but they are not.  He said people may unwillingly give them money thinking they're helping but they're really not.

Nathan said it's a misconception that there aren't enough homes for the animals and that's why they must be put down.  He said we could zero out the killing if we properly attacked the problem.  He said the shelters often have poor hours, poor customer service, poor marketing, dirty facilities, and people are turned away for arbitrary reasons.  And this all makes adoption numbers stay down.  Nathan said when the shelters are welcoming, the animals win and the animals live!

Janette asked if it is impossible to think we could ever become a "no kill" country.  Nathan said the question is not "if" but "when" we will become a "no kill" country.  He said we must fight for it but we don't have to win the hearts and minds of the people because they already believe it!  Nathan said we have to fight places like the ASPCA that say killing is an act of kindness.  He said once we tackle that issue the options will change.  Nathan said there are many things shelters can do like take the animals off site to get them seen by more potential adoptees, partner with rescue groups, embrace volunteers and foster homes.  He said they need better marketing and alternative programs like behavior rehabilitation.  Nathan said many shelters don't do those simple things and shelters aren't reaching out to animal lovers in the community.

Janette and Nathan mentioned the Companion Animal Adoption Rescue Act.  Nathan said we're not going to wait until the pound and shelter directors wake up.  He said they have model legislation they're pushing through and people can go to nokilladvocacycenter.org to learn more.  This legislation forces shelters to operate the shelters more ethically.  He said some states have already adopted the legislation but we must contact our representatives to let them know it's important to us!

Janette and Nathan took several calls from listeners.  One caller specifically mentioned her frustration with a shelter in New York.  Nathan was familiar with the shelter and said they like to plead poverty as the reason they must kill animals when they're really not using the money to save the lives of animals. He encouraged her to look on his website and "Rescue 50 Mission" to learn how to redirect shelters back to lifesaving.  He said there's a step-by-step guide to political advocacy there too.  Lastly, Nathan reminded the caller that it's a marathon and not a sprint and she must be in it for the long haul and not give up!

They took several more calls from listeners who expressed their frustrations with the politics involved. Nathan said in our democracy when the people don't get involved the status quo runs amok.  He said we must exercise our rights, meet with our representatives and start demanding solutions.  Janette thanked Nathan for calling in and for standing up for the sector of our community that cannot standup for themselves.  She recommended listeners go to nokilladvocacycenter.org to learn more!

VODKA TASTING AND TOASTING!
Then Janette wanted to share with the staff Horilka that she drank while she was in Ukraine.  And James planned a taste test for the staff where they could taste various flavored vodkas!  Shoshana smelled the Horilka and said it smelled like nail-polish remover. Pete said it smelled like rubbing alcohol.  All the staff drank it though as Janette gave a toast!

Then James let the staff try and guess several flavored vodkas he brought in to see if they could guess what flavor they were sipping.  No one guessed correctly except for the chocolate flavored one.  They tasted cotton candy vodka, chocolate vodka, iced tea flavored vodka, orange whipped cream vodka and rootbeer vodka.  There are also bacon, lavender and espresso flavored vodkas!  Pete said they all tasted like flavored sunscreen or flavored lip balm.  

Janette toasted the Rosie Radio staff and thanked them for helping her make it through the past two days.  She also toasted to Lou who found love with Maral since being on the radio.  Pete, who prefers whiskey said he isn't allowed to drink with Lou anymore because he gets too drunk with him.  His wife said he's not allowed to go out with Lou because he cannot function the next day.  And lastly, Janette toasted the the Blogtourage (a great group of Rosie Radio fans) who have been so supportive to the Rosie Radio staff for these past two years.

Janette closed the show saying that Rosie will be back tomorrow and they'll find out all about her trip!

and that's what you missed -kw
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